“We all know that life comes with no guarantees–that things worth doing involve some discipline, some discomfort, some risk. We often forget, though, that this risk, this stepping out, this taking on new challenges, offers the greatest reward, and that spontaneity and freedom lead to adventure. That expressing yourself, sticking your neck out and taking a chance, are part and parcel of that delicious pleasure of simply: “being alive”.
– Werner Erhard
An Attitude is a perception or viewpoint that is expressed as an emotion, or a feeling. This attitude justifies the moves your make or don’t make and the actions you take or don’t take.
An attitude is actually a judgment, a cry of “foul play!” “No fair!” It is based on a judgment or opinion of how something should have gone, or what someone “should have done,” or how it “should” go if you are going to get life right. Attitudes are full of “should’s”.
The actions you take, or in-actions you tolerate, are based on your attitude, your viewpoint about the “should’s” of life. Attitudes are always a reflection of your feelings, your seemings, and your myths, folklores, legends and assumptions.
Attitudes are very strongly attached to our behavioral patterns, and are validated or reinforced by our families, friends, colleagues and communities with whom we interact.
Our attitudes, beliefs, viewpoints and values drive us towards, or away from, some fear. The community you belong to has the same attitudes, beliefs, viewpoints and fears. Why else would you all hang out together?
This is why it is challenging to “break out of the mold,” create life newly, take new approaches or launch ourselves free from, and way from, the group dynamic of our tribe. Our behavioral patterns are complex, because the group dynamic reinforces them.
For example, take someone that has a history of earning $50,000 a year. Ask them to list the 5 friends or family members that they are closest with. Then ask them to estimate how much those 5 friends/relatives make a year. Add the total up, and I promise you, the individual’s personal income will fall somewhere in the middle of the group average.
Now, take that person and work with, live with, and interact daily with 5 millionaires for a month. Their vision will have expanded greatly. They will think differently, dream differently, envision life on a much larger scale, and be able to see the world from a different perspective. They will use speak, think, create and perform differently. They will literally have a different experience of being alive. New attitudes bring new possibilities.
Speaking and thinking newly is not enough. To build a new muscle, to practice your new vision, you MUST surround yourself with people who think like you want to think, speak of life the way you want to create your life, and take bold actions that are consistent with their thinking and speaking.
Now, who is in the network that surrounds and supports you? What kind of speaking are you allowing around you? Who are you talking with, and listening to – other’s belief systems, or your own heart?
It is up to you. Think new thoughts. Do not get complacent. Do not get resigned. Do NOT let yourself become part of the “normal” again!
You are that bold. You are that audacious. You looked at yourself in the mirror and said, “OK … if it’s gonna be, it’s up to me.” You put your heart in your hand, packed your bags, and flew off to Mexico to have your weight-loss surgery and begin your life newly.
It’s your life! It’s up to you!
- What dreams have I given up on? Negotiated away?
- What have you settled for?
- What if your only job in life was to be happy? What would you be doing?
- If time and money were not an issue, what would you create? What would you go for?
- Now that you have had your surgery, and experiencing yourself newly, what are your limitations? What stops you from acting on behalf of your goals?
- Go to a favorite bookstore, and research what it would take to create an action plan. Most frequently we do not take actions because we don’t know where to start. Well, just start! Jump in anywhere! The beginning might be the middle! In Stephen Covey’s book, “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, “ he states that you might begin with the end in mind. In other words, write your goal, and work backward.
- What assets will you need to accomplish your goal? Finances? Expertise? Mentoring? A coach?
- What actions will you need to take to produce your desired result?
- What will stop you from taking the actions or putting together the resources needed to achieve your goal?
- Journal! Journal! Journal!